Tales of Woe

Discussion in 'Kongai virtual card game' started by Klazlover, Aug 6, 2008.

  1. Klazlover

    Klazlover New Member


    We've all had those games. You know the one I am talking about. That game where you are up two, even three cards to one. One or two turns from victory, you type gee gee and your mind is already thinking about the next game, about possible new decks. A curiosity then tickles your wandering thoughts - "why is this match still running?" With no victory screen in sight, you realize your opponent has hit a miracle.

    No worries, you say. It is a mere annoyance, a blimp in your insurmountable lead. You issue the command to end the match. The little man running the RNG laughs. You pause a moment, dumbfounded.

    "lol," you type in the match chat. But it is the first sign of a cracked facade. Stone-faced, your opponent says nothing. A third time you go to end the match - your character dies.

    The bargaining begins. The spiteful RNG god has been placated. The unlikely death of a character has surely sated him. You blink the sweat from your eyes. Though your victory is still all but assured, a new caution has slipped into your play. You weigh your options and choose the best course of action.

    *Wiff*, You curse out loud, your frustration too great to co-ordinate physical strokes on the keyboard, your attention too riveted to glance away from the screen. Match chat is spared the profanity.

    You sit upon a crumbling throne. Your upright posture has reverted to a primate hunch, once bright eyes have become shaded recesses in an expressionless face. The shoe rests on the other foot. You have one shot left at victory. You press the button.

    Dull acceptance takes hold as the black and green screen for defeat fades into view.


    I created this thread to chronicle the most outrageous turns of luck to grace us in Kongai. Here you may regale us with your Tales of Woe for the amusement of all :)

    I'll start it off:

    Tale #1

    Opponent: Yoshi at 54 hp 50 energy (Caltrops, lol)
    Me: Full Hp / Energy Corn (Girdle) and Rumi 46 HP / 100 energy (Scroll)

    Corn vs Yoshi starting at close range:
    Open Palm (Stun) [3/40]
    Rising Dragon
    Open Palm (Stun) [3/40]
    Rising Dragon
    Rising Dragon

    Rumi (51 hp) vs Yoshi (54 hp/30 energy)
    Eviscerate (hit for stun) / Open palm (no stun)
    Poison Dart (miss) [1/10]
    Eviscerate (Dodged) / (Open palm (stun) [1/40]
    Rising Dragon

    This gentleman hits a 9/64,000 to win

    That Tale of Woe does not even close to an earlier ( and Hilarious) game

    Tale #2
    A quick summary for this one:

    Guy consecutively hits:
    3% crit [3/100]
    3% crit [3/100]
    25% proc [1/4]
    10% dodge [1/4]
    25% proc [1/4]

    For a grand total of 9/160,000 in probability.
    I curtly advised the gentleman to buy a lotto ticked and then hit sign out

    Can your Tale of Woe beat mine and bring a greater laugh?
    For your sake - I should hope not :)
  2. ahippie

    ahippie New Member

    Rumi (me) vs. Yoshi

    Eviscerate dodged/ OP stun
    OP stun
    OP stun
    Rising dragon

    1/10 * 1/4 *1/4 *1/4 + F*** U

    1/6400 chance, but this one makes u want to punch him in the face SO much more
  3. DropBounce

    DropBounce New Member

    In a somewhat ironic turn of events:
    Andromeda VS CC:

    Andromeda has chosen to use Trueshot.
    Andremeda's Trueshot missed Cornelius Constantine.
  4. Klazlover

    Klazlover New Member

    LoL @ ahippie - I got one more frustrating than that:

    Phylactery proc x7

    It's only a 1/2187 but I actually had to walk away from that one. I didn't trust my manners to hold out.
  5. Penney

    Penney New Member

    One game I recently lost I had to miss once on 95%, twice on 90%, fail to proc on eviscerate twice, opponent got a 3% crit, and opponent proc'd phylactery twice including in the final turn of the match after which his tackle went through and he killed me.

    I guess the odds against that are about 99.9998785%.

  6. garcia1000

    garcia1000 World Champion Moderator (old) Staff Member

    Hey guys,

    I am in some sort of insane RNG cold run which has lasted for 8 ranked matches now. I am actually tilted from some flash game, unbelievable. If Thesilent was experiencing this I think he would have defenstrated his monitor by now.

    To cap it off I get connection problems in my latest game.

  7. ShigityShank

    ShigityShank New Member

    You guys should check your math....
    it's actually 1/10* (19/20*1/4)^3= 6,859/5,120,000 which is approx. a 1/746.46 (0.134%) chance
    (3/10)^7= 6,561/10,000,000 which is approx. a 1/1524(0.06561%) chance.

    So it's not quite as bad as you guys thought!

    I've noticed a whole lot more of "when it rains it pours" games and just a lot more missing in general since they fixed the hits-fleeing/dodge bug (not more dodges, more misses)
  8. Klazlover

    Klazlover New Member

    (3/10)^7= 6,561/10,000,000 which is approx. a 1/1524(0.06561%) chance.

    So it's not quite as bad as you guys thought!


    I thought (3/10)^7= 2,187/10,000,000 ?
    3^1 = 3
    3^2 = 9
    3^3 = 27
    3^4 = 81
    3^5 = 243
    3^6 = 729
    3^7 = 2187

    Edit: And oh yeah, when it rains does it ever pour lol
  9. esiex3

    esiex3 Active Member

    I've had connection problems too, but I haven't seen much of the RNG' tricks lately except that one game I played vs garcia.
  10. garcia1000

    garcia1000 World Champion Moderator (old) Staff Member


    Okay so I'm playing a ranked match with some guy. He has server problems but can still chat. I'm at the "declare victory" screen. I say "hey mans, I'll wait a few minutes for you to reload Kongai".

    I wait a few minutes.

    The "disconnected" screen comes up, because apparently with no input from me for a few minutes, it thought we both disconnected.

    I lose 44 rank points because it's treated as a tie.

  11. Klazlover

    Klazlover New Member

    Thats not a tale of Woe >_<

    Make it juicier lol we all get disconnects
  12. Bucky

    Bucky Well-Known Member

    A few days after Kongai went public, I had one game where I had a Helene(sharpening stone) at about 40 HP out and a completely fresh Higashi(Insignia) in reserve. My opponent sent out their last card, deadly poison Popo, at close range. He decided to stay at close and spam Darts.

    I landed exactly one hit between the two characters.
  13. ShigityShank

    ShigityShank New Member

    oops, you's right. I had another 3 in there by mistake. It's .02187% or about 1 in 4572 games. So it's actually WORSE than you thought.
  14. esiex3

    esiex3 Active Member

    Meh, the first time I was playing TheSilenT, I was about to lose on the last turn. It was my Ashi vs his Helene at close and the last two characters on both sides. His helene missed a fatal frenzied strikes and I killed him with bleeding slice. I laughed so hard after that that I fell out of my chair.

    Also, today I missed two ninja ports in a row against a cornelius. What's funny is that he hypnotoaded one of them.
  15. Penney

    Penney New Member

    Its even better when you say "Im going to wait for you to reconnect" and they hit Declare Victory on you.

    Since then, I don't trust anybody. I hit Declare Victory within a tenth of a second if I don't know the person well.

  16. garcia1000

    garcia1000 World Champion Moderator (old) Staff Member

    I think I am playing badly during my downswing too
  17. Checkeredshirt

    Checkeredshirt New Member

    I am sooooo glad it's not only me. I went from 4200 or so points to 3200 this weekend. Almost all of them involved some sort of RNG curse. Now I think I'm playing poorly on top of that. I've quit ranked matches for a bit and am building up my confidence in quickmatches.
  18. Penney

    Penney New Member

    I lost a couple hundred points too, but I blamed my bad cards. I was trying to win some cards in regular games that would allow me to build more than just 1 or 2 decent decks.

    Out of all the cards I would label as the bottom 15 or so cards in Kongai I think I have 10 of them =/ Valuable spaces I wish were taken up with more cards I would label as being in the top 15.

  19. icewolf34

    icewolf34 Well-Known Member

    I typed out a longish story about losing a 3v1 against unhittable (even with Ray of Light and Poison Dart!), always crit/procing (as in, 3 crits and 2 procs out of 6 total attacks) Popo,

    but then my browser crashed. Irony?
  20. esiex3

    esiex3 Active Member

    Holy crap,

    I've lost 600 points today and yesterday from RNG bullshit or server bullshit. I can tolerate some of the RNG bull, but come on :/

    Me vs Red, Hig at 30 HP vs yoshi at 22(?)hp. We do an open palm high five, my OP misses and his hits and stuns :/
  21. garcia1000

    garcia1000 World Champion Moderator (old) Staff Member

    If those were the last characters, at least he missed an extra 3% win chance :)
  22. esiex3

    esiex3 Active Member

    it was actually 38 so no he didn't ;_;
  23. vesu

    vesu New Member

    Everybody uses this phrase wrong. It is not a funny way of saying "why", as in. "why would this happen to me?". It is the onomotapeia of a deep scream of rage.

    This meme is based on a tendency of anime or video game characters to scream from the bottom of their diaphram whenever they brutally slay an opponent, or are preparing to execute the attack that will do so.

    The origin of this sound is a game called jojo's bizzare adventure. In this game, the attack, ZA WARUDO (which roughly means "the world"), freezes time, allowing your character to suspend dozens of knives in time so that when the time stop expires they will be shredded. The final phase of this maneuver is when the player drops a BULLDOZER on the victim, inducing a bloodcurling roar of victory.


    Which is actually a romanization of what is supposed to be pronounced "REEEEEE".

    He then beats his opponent while they are pinned, then sets the bulldozer on fire, causing one final ridiculous explosion. Hence why this sound has become a synonym for a terrible victory, an utter pwnage that nobody could survive.

    Examples; Yoshiro lands Open palm stun in succession to kill a full hp Vvoss that is wearing a girdle. You defeat an opponent without losing a single charcter, etc.

    Thank you for listening to my lesson on using internet memes correctly.
  24. TheSilenT

    TheSilenT New Member

    I really wish Kong kept a log of all my games. Not even jokingly, I'd imagine I have the worst hit/attempt ratio and lowest proc rate of people who have played more than 100 (don't tell me it all balances out, I've played over 500 games, no balance). This is the tale of the worst loss I have ever experienced. I have it written down to remember just how messed up the RNG is. Keep in mind, this is before they fixed the Yoshi dodge chance.

    Current range: Close


    Cornelius w/ Girdle (in play):
    77 HP
    80 EN EN

    Ambrosia w/ Tomes:
    70 HP
    100 EN

    My opponent:

    Yoshi w/ Insig:
    52 HP
    100 EN

    First turn: I choose Pilebunker, he chooses Open palm. His palm connects for 19 damage, I'm now at 58 HP. The immune indicator shows to tell that the Palm would have proc'd, but the Girdle stopped it. My Pilebunker misses. I'm now down to 50 EN.

    Second turn: Same choices on attacks. His Palm hits, and procs strait through my girdle (6.25% chance). I'm now at 39 HP.

    Third turn: Rising dragon. Rest. I'm at 16 HP. He's at 90 EN, which seems like an easy kill.

    Fourth turn: I go far, and chuckle as he does not go close. I VS, he guesses right and Chis. I die. Oh well, he lost a lot of energy, right?

    I switch in Ambro.

    Fifth turn: I Bleed. He takes 6 damage, down to 46. He rests to go back up to 85 EN.

    I do the math. I can't eat the Chi and hope to survive long enough to kill him.

    Sixth turn: I go close, which brings me to 40 EN. I go for Vamp, he goes for Palm. His palm, being one faster, hits for 19 damage, bringing me to 51 HP. It doesn't proc. My Vamp misses. He takes 6 damage from bleed.

    Seventh turn: I go for lolboots, he goes for dragon. My boots hit, and tomes proc, bringing him down to 18 HP. His dragon hits, bringing me down to 35 HP. Bleed hits him again for 6, meaning he has 12 HP left.

    Eigth turn: I go for boots, not that it matters, the last two turns of Bleed would kill him even if his palm procs. Like an idiot, he goes for dragon, throwing away his 25% chance to tie. It crits for 41 and I die. I break my keyboard (really).
  25. Klazlover

    Klazlover New Member

    lol @ TheSilent.

    I find Yoshi and Popo to be the 2 characters most capable of ruining someone's day D:
  26. TheSilenT

    TheSilenT New Member

    It's not just that. On two separate occasions, my opponent made foolish mistakes that actually, by some unbelievable miracle, became positive.

    That's Dio, and JBA is a manga long before it is a game, even if the mudah flash originated from the latter.
  27. Claytus

    Claytus Well-Known Member

    Um... you know not of what you speak, sir. It's not an internet meme, nor is it borrowed from anime. In fact, quite the opposite, anime borrows from real life in this case.

    Go learn any martial art, and they'll actually teach you how to scream like that because it's very important for focusing your strength, and psyching out your opponent. It's called a kiai, as in:

  28. Unspeakable

    Unspeakable New Member

    Yoshiro is lame. Almost as bad as Popo since his innate got fixed. That is all.
  29. TheSilenT

    TheSilenT New Member

    Just lost 15 more games in a row to bullcrap. That makes 22/24 of my last games in ranked play losses, all due to unimaginably bad luck bordering on the game being just plain fixed. If I complained about the RNG in beta, that was absolutely nothing to this.

    I'm done with Kongai. I didn't ever need good luck. I didn't even want average luck. I just wanted luck that wasn't going to make me miss more than 50% of the time, hit 0/24 procs in a game, get critted on like my opponent suddenly has everyone equipped with a Sharpening Stone, and loads of other mind blowing crap.

    Just for fun, I really would like to see a log of all my games. Really. I would pay $50 for it right now. I guarantee it would make the average person cry, and statisticians fall out of their chairs.
  30. Penney

    Penney New Member

    Its probably out of your system now if it was that bad, sounds like its time for the law of averages to work out in your favor. Too bad you wont be around to see it =/

  31. Xom

    Xom Patreon Supporter

    Gambler's Fallacy
    Also, this goes in your sig, so that people like me who have sigs turned off don't see it.
  32. TheSilenT

    TheSilenT New Member

    Make that 16. Xom is absolutely right.

    This game was up there as one of the longest Cain phylac streaks in history. He hit 5 strait procs, and critted his last attack, robbing me of my chance to test the waters for a 6th time.

    I said I was going to quit, and I will. If I had high blood pressure, this crap would have me in the hospital every day. I'm done until the RNG is fixed, less luck is involved, or I can get a log just to see how badly I've been screwed over these months.
  33. Penney

    Penney New Member

    I know what the Gambler's Fallacy is and I also know what thinking positive is.

    Try looking that one up.

  34. garcia1000

    garcia1000 World Champion Moderator (old) Staff Member

    Once I played a match against Thesilent and my evisc stunned while his didn't. He then proceeded to go on mega monkey tilt and become really predictable. But that was the only "unlucky" thing during the match.

    Afterwards, he chalked that game up as another one in his long run of RNG bad luck.
  35. TheSilenT

    TheSilenT New Member

    Mega monkey tilt?


    Anyways, I remember that match, I was flipping a coin half the time since it was during my longest losing streak and I was fed up, so there's no way I was predictable, probably just playing weaker than I could have.

    And that was against you, so even the slightest bad luck would screw me over. I didn't rage over it, though, as it was a legitimate loss due to being outplayed. Not like some other games.
  36. Xom

    Xom Patreon Supporter

    Fair enough.
  37. garcia1000

    garcia1000 World Champion Moderator (old) Staff Member

    I was prepared for a mega tilt outburst once your eviscerate didn't stun.

    It fulfilled my expectations, and more!

    Anyway I think there is a component of playing bad that inevitably goes with bad luck
  38. garcia1000

    garcia1000 World Champion Moderator (old) Staff Member

    This is the sort of RNG thing I am talking about. Not ridiculously sux, but it is just tilted against me so that I don't get the expectation I should be getting. I get to pull off a triple mistress command frenzy, but the screen is conspicuously lacking in procs.

  39. ShigityShank

    ShigityShank New Member

    So are we all pretty much agreed that something is up with the RNG since August began?

    Now this could simply be that ours is the 1 in a trillion parallel universes where everyone's bad luck is just coalescing right now and things will eventually go back to normal, but I think string theory is bullshit :p

    Hey, at least you got a crit!

    Seriously though, I think something's up with Zina. I've been having weird bugs where she doesn't hit the bench with Tiger Frenzy.
  40. TheSilenT

    TheSilenT New Member

    I was playing Zina vs. a limping Ashi at far. My opponent switched in their Zina while I used Mistress. Seeing a free opportunity, I used mistress again, and they did as well. I had 2, they had 1. We both used Frenzy. I got 1 of 3 deadly poison procs, and 0 of 6 mistress procs. They hit 2 of their 3 tiger claws, stunned/bled my Zina and hit both of my benched with bleed. They then proceeded to stun my Zina again, and pretty much annihilate my deck
    Zina isn't broken. The RNG is. Also, Shiggity, I think all beta testers just got secretly hit with a permanent -10% to all RNG rolls to balance things out or something. Hurts you, knocks me into another dimension of pain and torture altogether.
  41. redenmity

    redenmity New Member

    Uhhh.... you guys are just now noticing how horrible the RNG can be sometimes? I've been going thru crap like that since beta. I remeber using MC'd Tiger Frenzy x3 vs. a noob with Onimaru at far who wouldn't push close. Fortunately for him, i missed 4/9 and got 0 procs with the 80% Deadly Poison and current MC.
  42. snarles

    snarles Member

    Not everyone is having super-bad RNG. Just the guys who are complaining.

    Turns out that if you play hundreds of games, you will run into some pretty bad RNG streaks.
  43. TheSilenT

    TheSilenT New Member

    There's a difference between sometimes, and consistently. Wait, not even consistently, more like more often than not. 23/25 games lost, all of them involving crap luck, some of them just plain cheating where it's absolutely impossible to win.

    Getting screwed in 5 out of every 6 games, 3 of those 5 being so terrible it's amazing, over 500+ games is not a bad streak. It's just stupid.
  44. snarles

    snarles Member

    That's too bad, but it's not like you are "cursed " or anything. Your bad luck is in the past, so try to forget about it.
  45. jmdt

    jmdt New Member

    Yesterday I had a game that came down to my Yoshi vs his Popo w/ feather close, both full energy full health. He was using poison dart and it missed the the first several times, but in 10 hits between rising dragon and open palm (100% and 95%) I missed all 10 when just 3 would have killed him. He got a lot of milage out of that 50% dodge.
  46. garcia1000

    garcia1000 World Champion Moderator (old) Staff Member

    I wouldn't mind but this is happening in my poker too. Just as I am moving up limits too, wtf :confused:

    Okay so a 4 buy-in downswing doesn't sound so bad. And it isn't. It's just that I am playing against drooling morons that would lose massively if they were playing play money games online. :madgarcia:
  47. zakid

    zakid Member

    i had a very funny match a week ago. But I managed to win due to 1)RNG, 2) my opponent being a moron.
    I don't remember all the details, but endgame problem looked more or less like this:
    My elusive Tafari - about 50HP, 90 energy, 0 dark resistance for 2 turns (double blood-burn) vs Juju (chalice i think) full hp full energy; far range.
    I prefered to eat a ToD than a 100% Hex so I moved close. ToD missed (98% acc). I started spamming poison darts, which were procing like crazy (4 consecutive ones proced). Juju kept making Staff Strikes and i dodged three of them (no hide, 25%).
    Despite such amount of luck I still was in a pretty bad position. As I said I don't remember all the details, but after a Poison Dart - Staff Strike (and one Healing Touch) struggle we ended up in following situation.
    Tafari - about 10Hp, 50 energy
    Juju - 23HP, 60 energy
    When I was about to lose, Juju....went far. I don't know why. Then I did a Poison Dart (Juju rests) and a Poison Dart+proc.gg
  48. ShigityShank

    ShigityShank New Member

    I seriously do think something is up with the RNG. It's not just giving me bad luck. It's giving my opponent's bad luck as well.

    I haven't been playing ranked since I started noticing it, but a recent QM game I played had me facing my Popo starter vs. Higashi starter.
    The guy missed 3 open palms in a row. Not dodges, straight up misses.
    I missed my first poison dart, crit-procced my second, missed my third, and then went far and proceeded to crit 5 straight slingshots. Popo ended up hit a grand total of 1 time from a Hex (which for those who dont remember, is 100% hit).

    I thought about posting the story in the Tales of Woe thread, but wasn't really my Woe.

    And I just played a game just now with 10 90% misses between us and another Popo crit-proc for me on my poison dart.
    My last 30 games or so, it's felt like the RNG only has 2 speeds: Awesome and Crap.
    In the past I've had streaks of good luck and streaks of bad, but this is unusually volatile, and concerns me since we're all (or a significant portion of us) are being affected by a run of wacky RNG.
  49. snarles

    snarles Member

    If you want to prove that hit/proc rates have been modified, you will have to record everything in at least 20 matches to get a good sample.

    And this has nothing to do with the fact that you're using Popo?
  50. xAS

    xAS New Member

    I just had to post this one.

    Ambrosia (vial) vs. Higashi (crane)

    Vamp Kiss (miss) -- Open Palm (hit, no proc)
    Vamp Kiss (miss) -- Open Palm (hit, no proc)
    Vamp Kiss (miss) -- Open Palm (hit, no proc)
    Switch -- Switch

    Yoshiro (jade statue) vs. Popo (insignia)
    Rising Dragon (dodged) -- Poison Dart (miss)
    Rising Dragon (dodged) -- Herbal Preparation (+25 hp)
    Rising Dragon (dodged) -- Posion Dart (hit)
    Switch -- Herbal Preparations

    Ambrosia vs. Popo
    Spectral Choke (miss) -- Herbal Preparations
    Spiked Boots (miss) -- Switch

    Ambrosia vs Higashi
    Switch (dead) -- Intercept

    Yoshiro vs. Higashi
    Open Palm -- Sweep
    Open Palm (miss) -- Switch

    Yoshiro vs. Popo
    Rising Dragon (dodged) -- Herbal Preparations (+ 25hp)
    Rising Dragon (dodged) -- Herbal Preparations
    Rising Dragon (dodged) -- Poison Dart (2 poisons from HP, 1 from PD)
    Rising Dragon (FINALLY HITS) -- Posion Dart

    ...and I'm dead.

    The game before it, I had Phylactery proc 3x against me in a row. Maybe it's a sign....

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