Ive been playing fighting games ever since I was only 6 years old and still playing them a lot to this day. I've changed from a simple masher to an annalist who study fighting games too much. I was eager to become part of the community around these games to have my chance at the exciting competition. For years now Ive been studying, training, and developing competitive mindset to play these games for my opportunity at competing. But in the process I lost my blissful joy of playing these game for fun. I've become obsessed with trying to compete and win. At first I though competition will be fun,till I find myself being depress over my short coming at competitive play, and becoming a bitter sore loser in the long run.Many times I've try to quite fighting games, with negative results. Games in general have always been an influence on me, so simply avoiding all together was difficult. Since I couldn't resist playing these games. I try studying competition to form an understanding, with hope to developed some humility towards competition. Yet I was unable to do this. Instead I've become disappointed in the community since I couldn't draw myself to agree to some of the concepts of competitions that the fighting game community has adopted. Realizing this I figure I wasn't suited to be part of this community. I''m currently in the process of trying to become casual gamer again. I'm practicing moderation but I fear its not enough.